Tag: total love

WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE Improving The Marriage Relationship

Improving The Marriage Relationship

By Gideon in Blog, MARRIAGE on September 27, 2017

It has been evident in recent years that marriage relationships are deteriorating in our society. Satan is trying to destroy the home, but we praise God for every effort toward its preservation.

God’s blessing is upon the husband-wife relationship. Proverbs 18:22 says, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favor of the Lord.” Not only does marriage and the husband-wife relationship have a blessing from the Lord, but also in God’s Word we are given guidelines by which we can maintain the husband-wife relationship as God intended it to be. Marriage was meant to be a blessed relationship.
And so we ask the question—is your husband-wife relationship a blessed relationship, or is it a strained ordeal?

1. What the Marriage Relationship Should Be Like

In Ephesians 5 we observe that the husband-wife relationship is compared to that of Christ and the Church. In other words, our model indicates that the husband-wife relationship is one that lasts forever, a kinship that grows sweeter as the years go by, a relationship that provides an example of peace and joy, a relationship that will weather the storms and trials of life, and one against which the gates of Hell cannot prevail. Hopefully we can say that by the grace of God we have found our relationship in the home to be that way.

Even children can quickly sense whether mother and father really love each other and whether there is the warmth of love in their home, or whether there is a distance and a coldness between the parents. You may remember the story about the home that was preparing for a wedding. Big sister was getting married and little sister was all eyes and ears to know what was going on and what this was all about. One day she heard them talking about the marriage vows. She said, “What’s that all about?” Mother answered, “Well, that is when big sister and her boyfriend will promise to love and always be kind to each other as long as they live.” Little sister thought a moment, and said, “Well then, you mean that you and daddy aren’t always married.” It is quite clear that our children know what kind of relationship we really have.
>>>>>>>>>Also Read This:4 Common Problems in Marriage
I read about a husband whose job required that the family move frequently. While he was temporarily assigned work in one particular area, his family lived in a small hotel room. One day the little girl (for want of a bigger place to play) was playing “doll-house” down in the lobby. One kind lady passed through the hallway, and tried to be helpful and sympathetic. She said to the little girl, “It’s a pity that you don’t have a home of your own.” The little girl responded, “Oh, we do have a home; we just don’t have a house to put it in.” Can you say your relationship is such that you have a home even if your house is less than adequate? If father and mother are happy together, that contentment is conveyed to the children. Judge Gilliam says, “The lack of affection between father and mother is the greatest source of delinquency that I know.” Is your relationship what you would like it to be? Does it bother you when you see another couple that seems to really be happy?

2. Ways To Improve the Marriage Relationship

All sincere married partners want to improve their marriage. No couples should ever be satisfied where they are. In school, we learned a little motto which goes like this: “Good, better, best! Never let it rest until your good is better and your better is best!”

One couple whose marriage was just about on the rocks determined that they were going to improve their marriage by God’s help. The husband describes what they did: “We got together and took a pencil and paper and each wrote down the things we did not like about the other. We had a long list. When done, we exchanged the papers, and we found it was difficult to face each other’s list. We walked together to a point where we burned the papers and watched them go up in flames. Then we came back and sat down and started making a list of things we liked about each other. This was difficult too, but when the lists were completed, we exchanged the papers and looked at them. Later we framed them and hung them in our bedroom, so that each morning when we arise we can see what our partner likes, and concentrate on doing those positive things. By God’s grace, it has transformed our marriage.” If your marriage is not what you would like it to be, and you really seriously mean business—by God’s grace, it can be improved. However you must be willing to work at it.

(a) Avoid comparing your marriage with other marriages

It is a tragic mistake to look at the marriage relationship of another couple and to wish that your relationship would be like theirs. According to 2 Corinthians 10:12, we should not be among the number who compare ourselves among ourselves, because such people are not wise. Our human nature tends to see the good points (the “plus” points) in others who are more distant from us, and the bad points (the “minus” points) in those who are closer to us. If we keep looking at the minus points, we will have a different outlook in life. Remember that the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence, but keep in mind too that the closer you are to the circumstances, the easier it is to see the faults.

A magazine article pointed out what it called “an ideal marriage” between a state governor and his wife. Yet it was only a matter of a few years until their marriage was on the rocks. From a distance the marriage looked successful, but it must not have been quite as great as the writer thought. We need to stop looking around and stop comparing our relationship with that of another husband and wife. We must realize that couples are different. God did not intend that all of us should conduct our homes in the same way, and that we should all like the same things—or He would have made us all over the same carbon copy. Some couples like to be on the go almost all the time, almost every night of the week. Then there are other couples whose nature it is to stay home much of the time. In some homes, the wife is reserved and the husband is outgoing; in others, the wife can not sew and the husband is not a businessman. We must accept the fact that God has made us all different, and then we must concentrate on just being ourselves in the light of Ephesians 5:21 which says, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.” Most of the time we overlook that verse and think only upon the following verses which tell us that husbands should “love” and wives should “submit.” But actually,Ephesians 5:22-23 gives the further instructions once we have accepted the point of verse 21, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.” In other words, we should not look at other people, but submit ourselves to each other and work out the marriage relationship which God has ordained for us.

(b) Build an attitude of trust toward your partner

Do you as married partners really trust each other? Can you (the husband) say to your wife: “Am I really worthy of your trust? Do you feel that you will be my `one and only’ forever?” Do you as a husband (or as a wife) enjoy being with your partner more than with anyone else? You will want to be together as much as possible. People today speak very lightly about trust and the high ideal of a solid marriage relationship. Even secular counselors tell us they are finding out that the kind of loose living which is common today simply is not working. It doesn’t work because until one is really committed to another person for life, he cannot actually give himself wholeheartedly to that person.

Many ask what is wrong with pre-marital sex and mention that “everybody is doing it,” and they argue that no one is going to find out about the relationship anyhow. But you cannot really give yourself physically or emotionally or spiritually until you can trust each other and know that the relationship will last for life. If you are one who thinks that there is not much wrong with pre-marital sex, it will be difficult for your partner to trust you. If, on the other hand, you count fornication as a wicked sin, your partner can much more readily trust you. If you were loose in your living before your marriage, how can your partner trust you after marriage? When passion wears out, how will your partner know that you will not go out and try some other thrill when you are bored with her?

God’s Word says we are to confess our faults one to another (James 5:16), and this is good advice for married couples as an aid in building trust. Some might say that “What my partner doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” But we are spiritual beings and not mere physical creatures. We can cover up the past, but there is always the possibility your partner will find it out, and so it is best to confess your misdeeds. This will help build trust and will lead to a happier marriage relationship.
>>>>>>>>>Also Read This:7 Traits That Separate Good From Great Marriage
When someone says “My partner does not trust me”—one of the first questions I ask is: “What have you done to cause your partner to feel that way?” The partner must not necessarily be blamed. You may be the one to blame if your companion does not trust you. I believe that if we husbands feel our partners do not trust us, then we ought to be a leader and go to the wife and ask what is wrong, and give her the right to tell us why she does not trust us. I also believe that where it says “Husbands love your wives,” we have a clear command not only never to commit adultery with someone else, but to love our wives with our body, mind, soul, and spirit. Only then can we have a beautiful marriage relationship. One of the big weaknesses of many husbands is the fact that after marriage, there is a tendency for him to sort of secretly admire someone else. A wife can detect that real quickly.

Let each husband abstain from all appearance of evil, and beware of placing ourselves into tempting circumstances—for we are all human, and we can easily fall. I read recently about a couple who were happily married, but another couple with whom they could share closely, became good friends. They were together so much, and in each other’s presence so often—it soon came to the place that they were too intimate, and before they realized it, both marriages were wrecked—because the one husband started to admire the other wife more than he did his own wife. Beware of circumstances where you sense you are no longer admiring only your partner, because you will lose your trust, and your marriage could falter.

(c) Diligently try to please your partner

To improve marriage relationships, it is important to try and please your partner. God’s Word says that the wife tries to please her husband (1 Corinthians 7:34), and the Christian husband tries to please his wife (1 Corinthians 7:33). Are you really trying to please your married partner, or do you frequently say, “I’ll do what I please”? Is your attitude one which says, “if we can’t agree, we will each go our own way”? This kind of relationship does not make for a happy marriage bond.

The important question in marriage is not, “How can I have all my needs fulfilled in this marriage—but how much love can I express in meeting the needs of the one I marry?” Love says, “I will give.” Immaturity says, “Please me, and I will try to please you.” Do you ever do things just to “bug” your partner? Do you ever tease your partner when you know he doesn’t like it? There are too many marriages lived out on the “I’ll get even” basis. “If you treat me this way, I’ll get back in this way.” The husband is one hour late for supper, so his wife makes him wait an hour for supper the next night. This kind of action will not work for harmony. One husband might say, “I’m going hunting; I don’t care what you say.” The wife says she is going shopping and will spend as much money as she wants. This is not the way to please each other as partners. This is the “get even philosophy” and such a marriage is going to be much less than ideal.

Instead of living on the “get even” level, try this formula: Try sharing, bearing, working, and changing together. It should be a continuation of courtship days. Husband and wife are different in order to challenge each other, to grow together toward maturity, and not to see who is right or to determine what is right. One of the goals for married partners is to determine how we can best change together for the honor and glory of God.

3. Factors To Guard in the Marriage Relationship

Let me go a little further. It is a sin for married partners to refuse physical relationships for an extended period of time without mutual consent. The Scripture says, “The wife has not power of her own body, but the husband; and likewise the husband has no power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and come together again that Satan tempt you not in your incontinency” (1 Corinthians 7:4-5). In other words, the wife’s body does not belong to her alone, but also to her husband. And in the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone, but also to his wife.

We must exercise moderation in the area of physical relationships. It is possible that some couples use what they think is a “holier than thou” approach, and they try to get even with each other (and to get back at the partner) by withholding the sexual privilege. Some marriages are not what they ought to be because people physically are selfish. They want to try to please themselves. They reason this way: “If you don’t please me, I’ll get even.” When a husband by-passes his wife for his physical needs, and has his own private sexual releases, the wife then also turns her physical drive for affection to the love and kisses she receives from the children. It can even lead to affairs with other men. Withholding sexual privilege is not pleasing to God. It is not pleasing to your partner. Your marriage fulfillment will decrease.

Married partners also must guard against the danger of not learning to really know each other. Do you know your partner’s sorrows, joys, and concerns? Are you aware of what her life goals are? Or don’t you talk together about these kinds of things? Some time ago I was in a home where a wife and husband were members of different church denominations. I asked the husband where his wife attends church services. He mentioned where she normally attended. I asked whether she was a member of that church body. He said he is not sure if she considers herself a member or not. It is really difficult for me to imagine a husband and wife living under the same roof and talking so little about spiritual things.
>>>>>>>>>Also Read This:25 Principles To Grow Your Marriage
It is a sad fact, but it is true: Very few husbands and wives spend more than a few minutes each week really talking about things that matter. Many fail to have frequent heart-to-heart talks. Husbands and wives should be free to give constructive criticisms to each other, without being considered negative or harsh or critical. The husband should be the leader, but the wife as a help-meet can be a very wise counselor. God did not make each of us a whole unit. After marriage, each is only a half. It is only when both husband and wife put together their thoughts and concerns that they have a balanced outlook on life.

In conclusion, there is no “perfect” marriage. It requires a continual effort. A good marriage relationship requires a day-by-day, week-by-week attempt to keep things in harmony, but it is worth it all. Marriage can be a bit of heaven here upon earth. It is like a garden. You can have a beautiful garden, but you must keep the weeds down. So also in marriage, the devil is looking for marriages in which to sow the tares so that he can wreck the marriage. He hopes to keep it from bearing fruit. By God’s grace and help we can keep every weed dug out. The sooner we dig it out, or the sooner we go to a counselor for help, the more quickly we can have that beautiful relationship in Jesus Christ.

Because marriage here on earth is never perfect, each marriage needs two little “bears.” They are “bear” and “forbear.” We are not perfect; we all have weaknesses; we all have idiosyncracies. A mature Christian does not expect perfection in his mate. To all others, take heed to this illustration: There once was a young wife who after several months of marriage said to her husband, “You know, John, we have been married for a while and I have learned to know you better. I would like to remind you of a few of your faults.” He said, “Oh—I know all about my faults. That’s the reason I couldn’t marry a better woman.” Remember that none of us is perfect, but we can be forgiving. To err is human, but to forgive is divine. A good marriage is not one where perfection reigns.
A good marriage is a relationship where each partner has taken Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour of their lives, and where a healthy understanding, plus the grace of God, can overlook a multitude of unresolvable difficulties.

-By Samuel M. Cassel
Used by permission of Bible Helps, P O Box 391, Hanover PA 17331.USA
PLEASE SHARE IF THIS HAS BLESSED YOU!

WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE 4 Common Problems in Marriage

4 Common Problems in Marriage

By Gideon in Blog, MARRIAGE on July 9, 2017

Every relationship has its share of ups, downs and middle ground. Some days, weeks and months are just better than others.

There are some very typical problems, however, that can crop up and wreak havoc on even the most seemingly perfect union. Tackling them effectively can lead to a happier, healthier relationship that lasts.

So, what are the four common relationship problems and how to fix them?

Let’s take a look at each of the four common relationship problems and how to fix them on a separate basis. There are tips that are specific to each individual issue. Employing them can put relationships back on track.

1. Sex

This is a major component of most healthy, loving relationships. Sex is how people show their passion for each other and feel more connected and closer, and it’s simply the most intimate act a couple can enjoy.

Unfortunately, sex isn’t always great between couples. It might not “feel right,” or it may not come often enough. Sometimes a partner is frigid; other times he or she is too demanding or rough.

So, when it comes to this one of the four common relationship problems and how to fix them, what can be done?

Try being more open with a partner about sexual desires, expectations and wants. Be willing to listen to your partner’s needs, as well. Never be embarrassed to say what is really on your mind.

Explore new and exciting ways of being close. Don’t fear trying something new. If you and your partner are in a loving, trusting relationship, adventure should not be a concern. Just keep the communication lines open and make “bedroom talk” safe.

It is perfectly natural for couples to grow apart sexually after some time together. This is when a daring streak or a willingness to try new things or increase the romance level can come in handy.

2. Money

Of the four common problems in relationships and how to fix them, this one can be the most tricky to deal with. Money is a very major concern for many people and how it is spent can lead to some serious arguments.

If money, a lack thereof or unnecessary expenditures are concerns, try these things:

* Create a budget
– Work together to create a budget that works for your unique situation. Do your part to help stick within the budget.

* Don’t make “sneaky” purchases – Hiding purchases, breaking the budget in secret and other ploys can create major issues. Don’t do these things. Do, however, try to build “fun money” into the budget or give yourselves allowances you can save to make special purchases.

* Stay in focus – When money is tight, tempers can run high. Keep yourself grounded in what is truly important. Jobs can be lost and finances can be in shambles, but a relationship can last, grow and thrive if partners work together and focus on what is truly important.

3. Communication

This particular concern in the four common relationship problems and how to fix them is typically at the heart of all other issues. Open, clear communication is essential for healthy relationships.

To fix a broken line of communication, try practicing good skills. This means stating issues clearly, listening as your partner responds and working together to find solutions. Keep tempers in check, agree to disagree and stick to one issue at a time.
>>>>>>Also Read this:My husband, I have been unfaithful

Communication in good relationships is “safe.” Partners don’t feel threatened by saying what is on their minds. They are respectful and work together to build themselves and their relationship.

4. Household chores

This is perhaps the most amusing of the four common relationship problems and how to fix them. It can be a serious bone of contention between couples, and it’s a very typical complaint.

Fixing this problem takes some team work for sure. Work together to divide jobs or take turns doing it all. Do jobs your partner hates doing or vice versa. If there’s something you both despise, take turns biting the bullet.

In a well-run household, everyone pitches in and does their share. Work together to make this happen and use good communication skills to get over the humps.

The four common relationship problems and how to fix them are needed by almost every couple at some point in life. Work on good communication skills together and you can solve most issues, and above all allow God and His word to build with you in your marriage/relationship.
PLEASE SHARE AND DROP YOUR COMMENT BELOW!

WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE Nothing is Permanent

Nothing is Permanent

By Gideon in Blog, Life Sharing on May 31, 2017

Life Lessons: Nothing is Permanent

Online Editor
THISDAYLIVE | 2017-05-14T02:50:36+00:00

Our guest this week is Mr. Olu Abosede, Founder and former Managing Director of a wholly indigenous, quoted company, Aboseldehyde Plc. The company was once used as a reference point for other local entrepreneurs who would want their companies listed on the Nigerian Stock Exchange (NSE). Within a period of 14 years, the company had become a very strong brand in the country in its niche area.
Things were also pretty good for our guest who built his first personal multi-million Naira house at age 28 and the second at 32. His children were in choice schools locally and abroad. His house at Gbagada, in Lagos State, was a beehive of activities by friends and associates who regularly showed up on weekends to treat themselves to some choice wines in his well-stocked personal bar.
Then, in a sudden twist, from 2000, there was a gradual but irreversible slide of fortune, starting with the forced take-over of his company by creditors. And the rest came in quick succession. His two houses in Lagos were razed by fire, leaving him with no option than to move into a rented apartment.
Four times our guest attempted to commit suicide. In our first meeting, six years ago, Abosede shared some life lessons with me, some of which are documented below. But a few weeks ago, when I located him to update the interview, he could not communicate much as he is at the moment battling with stroke. But with the help of his second wife, he was able to put a few more lessons across. Enjoy the insight.
Lesson 1:
Better believe this: there is God!

Few years back, I would have argued that there was nothing like God or any external forces that get involved in the affairs of men. I had it very good early in life. I graduated at the age of 25 as a Chemist with multiple jobs waiting for me. I eventually picked up a job in one of the conglomerates then, as a Laboratory Chemist. And, within a short span of time, I moved steadily to the top. I had a car with a driver attached to me 24 hours. I never used one car for more than two years. I was exposed to a lot of training locally and abroad. In my own calculation, I had thought that my rapid rise was as a result of my own ability, personal intelligence and intellectual capacity.
It was after I had run out of options and I decided to just reflect more that I started to discover a startling fact: that the universe is governed by natural or spiritual laws which would work for you when you align yourself with those laws and would work against you if you contravene them. God is ever present in every little thing you do.
One lesson I have learnt is that there is a superior force that shapes things in the physical realm; and it is to one’s advantage to believe this.
Lesson 2:
Never lose confidence in yourself.

Whatever happens and whatever the circumstances you are facing, don’t lose faith and confidence in yourself. Once this is intact and you believe there is God who is always ready to work with you, you’d find that things become a lot easier. When you lose faith in yourself, ultimately, depression sets in and when depression sets in, you just discover that even what you knew you could do, you start to find it difficult.
We tend to underrate our abilities during crisis times; and once you do that, you would lose much ground which may take a considerable effort to recover. You would be astonished as to what you can do in crisis times once you don’t lose faith in yourself. Believing in yourself is a key step in coming out of failure.WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE Nothing is Permanent
Lesson 3:
Use crisis times to reinvent yourself.

Every single day I wake up, I gain more understanding about life that I could not have got without a crisis. In crisis times, usually every hope appears lost. This is usually the situation when you focus on the challenge instead of the opportunities that abound around you. But when you reinvent yourself and refocus, you would discover that there is always a little opening which if you recognise is usually planted by the Higher Power to take you out of that situation. I must say that my challenges were so overwhelming that I could not see any ray of hope anywhere.
Lesson 4:
Take Responsibility for every challenge you face.

Learn to take responsibility for any situation in which you find yourself.
When my ordeal started, I threw the responsibility on everyone else except myself. I blamed the banks that did not give me enough time to restructure the company and meet my outstanding obligations to them. I blamed friends who refused to sympathise with me and lend me helping hands when I needed them most. I blamed relatives who trooped in when the going was good, but disappeared at the slightest challenge. I blamed the press whom I thought did not give me fair-hearing. I blamed everyone else except myself.
But the more people I blamed the more depressed and miserable I became. For more than four years, I was angry with everybody and myself. I was even developing health problems in the process. Everyday as I blamed other people; I got the problem on the ground magnified.
Lesson 5:
There is no odd job in a crisis.

You don’t have wisdom and experience if you don’t have crises. I am talking of a situation where you are left with absolutely nothing -no influence, no privilege, no position and your name counts for little.
And things can turn bad very rapidly. I remember a time when things were still very good, a leasing company invited me to be on its board. I offered to nominate someone to represent me, but the company insisted that they wanted me because of my name and the goodwill I had built over time. That was gone during the crisis and my name really meant very little.
I learnt this truth in a hard way. To get out of a crisis especially when your back is on the wall, survival is the name of the game. No job can be considered odd in crisis times and you will multiply your sorrow if you sit down brooding over your former position and privileges.
To get out of the hole, the wisdom is in looking at your current position and seeing what you can do gradually to build up from that ground floor. Come to terms with the fact that you are on the floor. You must flush out anger, bitterness, envy and jealousy.
Lesson 6:
Nothing is permanent.

When I was the Chief Executive Officer (CEO), it never occurred to me that a time would come when I would not be able to do anything I felt like doing. I was hit by stroke some two years ago and with it all the dreams I had carried in my head, becoming a mirage. I have many things I want to do, but I do not have the energy and health to make them happen. The lesson is this: take every opportunity to make things happen when you have the energy; you cannot guarantee you will be able to keep it forever.
WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE Nothing is Permanent
Lesson 7:
Don’t be bitter with people.

This may be hard to understand but one lesson I am learning rather late is that when I am bitter with any human being, I am actually working against myself. When things were okay with me, my house was a beehive of activities. I had helped many people. I sponsored some to schools. But when things went bad, they were the first to desert me. I was bitter, and I still have a bit of bitterness towards them. However, as I am learning bitterness erodes health.
One Lesson – great advice
While in that situation, I just reflected on a statement made by Dr. Christopher Kolade when I invited him to be on the board of my company. I felt that with his goodwill bringing him on board would make a lot of difference to the company.
But in our first meeting, he said: “I know what you want to do; you want me to take responsibility for the success of the company. But you are responsible for the success of your company.” I continued to echo that statement.
I later realized that placing responsibility on others for whatever happens to you would invariably mean you have lost your personal power which the Higher Power has given to everyone. You are in this world for a purpose, and that purpose can only be realized by you and the Higher Power. It means that any action you take is yours.
This article is of THISDAY NEWSPAPERS LTD.
Make available online (via Fb account) by Mr Mathew Oladimeji Shotunde, NY, USA.
Re-published with graphics here with intention to share the lessons of life for better future. God bless you!

WORD-AFLAME LEADERSHIP COLLEGE 5 Secrets of Great Relationships

5 Secrets of Great Relationships

By Gideon in Blog, MARRIAGE on May 22, 2017

Have you ever seen a couple that’s been together a long time, but still looks hopelessly in love? Do you wish you could ensure your own relationship lasts that long and remains loving?

If you want to be in your golden years and still hold hands, cuddle and get along, there are some things you need to know. 

The five secrets of great relationships can be put to work in your life, and they can help you become happier, healthier and stronger as a couple.

So, how do some couples manage to stand the test of time and still smile, flirt and generate a feeling of love the whole world can notice? Here are some of the best-kept secrets of couples who really have it together:

1. Communication 

Solid, two-way communication is perhaps the most important of the five secrets of great relationships. If you’re not comfortable enough in your relationship to approach topics with openness, you have a problem.

Both parties in a relationship need to feel comfortable saying what’s on their minds without fear. Disagreements are perfectly OK, but sound communication skills to work through them with a positive outcome are vital.

2. Honesty 

This is essential for good communication, and it’s even more important in a good relationship. Being honest about feelings, wants, needs and desires is simply a must for longevity without regret or resentment. 

Both parties should feel comfortable saying what’s in their hearts.

3. Common interests 

Making room for common interests and some couple time are important parts of fostering love that lasts and the longevity of a relationship. 

This is among the most important of the five secrets of a great relationship because time together helps forge bonds that last.

Busy couples can still make some time by carving out “date nights,” taking up hobbies together or just taking out time at the end of a day to talk, cuddle or watch the sunset. It doesn’t matter what is done as long as it’s together as a couple without distractions.

4. Self-development 

As important as couple time is, so is development of self-interests. Strong couples tend to have strong partners. This means the individuals in a relationship have taken the time apart to develop into the people they truly want to be.

Couples that have loving, trusting and solid relationships don’t have to be together every second of the day to remain connected. 

Foster self-fulfillment and each half of the team can blossom. The end result is a stronger couple if self-development is carefully balanced with time together.

5. The bedtime rule 

There really is something to that old saying about never going to bed angry. Couples that understand the five secrets of great relationships know how important it is to get disagreements out in the open and resolved as quickly as possible.

While fighting is never an enjoyable moment, “fair fighting” can help relationships grow and couples grow stronger. To fight fair, stick to the topic, keep anger in check, state feelings clearly and listen to your partner’s input. Work together to resolve the issue.

As you work on incorporating the five secrets of great relationships into your life, remember that all couples have their ups and downs. 

Sometimes things go swimmingly, but there are other stretches when you really have to work hard at being good together.

If you want to be one of those “old couples” who still holds hands and enjoys gazing into each other’s eyes, every bit of effort will be worth it. The five secrets of great relationships can help you along the way. -Nick Morris, Spain.

UNUSUAL ENDORSEMENT

By Gideon in Blog, Faith and Work on December 1, 2016

“Verily I say unto you, Where so ever this gospel shall be preached throughout the whole world, this also that she hath done shall be spoken of for a memorial of her. Mark 14:3-9″.
Hmm……Are you profitable for Jesus and the gospel ministry, what will be your legacy in the church after you have gone, are you sure heaven will be happy about you……..think about this……there will be no hiding place when you suddenly close your eyes here, you will be heading straight to heaven or hell…….eternity is certain!
And then reward in heaven or you want to meet your lord empty handed !
Let us quickly take note of this: Jacob wasn’t a born-again of that time, he was a confirmed supplanter, that ran away from his brother Esau he has defrauded, so he can not possibly be a regenerated soul but a complete sinner. But after his encounter on his way at Bethel in the dream (Gen 28:10-22), he started to have conviction in him more about God especially when God presented and reaffirmed to him the covenant of his grand father- Abraham and also of his father- Isaac.
After the revelation, he has strong urge to anoint the place with oil and with a promise.
Here God endorsed Jacob miraculously and the rest story at Laban house was a great harvest for him and never stopped until he became Israel- the mind and purpose of God.
God endorses people with act of unusual faith shown towards him, such life suddenly becomes an epitome of glory and it doesn’t matter what people are calling them, what matter is God’s endorsement!
Check this….Obededom wasn’t an Isrealite, but a Philistine from Gath that had lived to understand fully the worship of the God of Israel and also the attitude of this living God (2 sam 6:10-12). He gladly accepted the care of the ark of God in his house -the rest was a great testimony of blessing just under three month.
This is exactly where we are going- the woman bought an expensive alabaster oil, break it and pour it on Jesus head-the rest was an unusual endorsement- Jesus with full authority announced in broad term and said,”Where so ever this gospel shall be preached throughout the whole world, this also that she hath done shall be spoken of for a memorial of her” this simply means that this woman will never be forgotten in the history of the gospel with great fame, and that finally became her honor.
When you take an unusual step of faith with Jesus- the rest is an endorsement from heaven-you will never be forgotten, but have your name printed in gold at the altar of gospel of Christ.
” For God is not unrighteous to forget your work and labor of love, which ye have showed towards his name, in that ye have ministered to the saints and do minister Heb 6:10″
Don’t forget this, unusual act of faith will provoke unusual endorsement for unimaginable glory. God bless you!-Dr G O Oyedepo.